Shame

Frozen feelings, abandoned self

Abstract

In therapy both the therapist and the client must be able to "see" and experience the person of the client. Next in degree to shock and related dissociation, shame seriously inhibits feelings, needs and even the cues of the client, to a degree that makes it imperative for the therapist to understand how shame develops and operates in people. In the grip of shame, it is as difficult for the client to be seen as it is for the therapist to see the client. The primary purpose of this paper is to discuss shame and raise some ideas that may challenge the therapeutic community. It is the result of years of my own personal work with shame issues, as well as 20 years of working with addiction and abuse recovery.